Embracing the In-Between: Navigating a Multicultural Identity

By Jamie-Lee Collman

“So, where are you from?” 

“What are you mixed with?”

“Oh, that makes sense. Your complexion gives it away.”

I always find it fascinating and somewhat laughable when I get asked these questions. They always give me pause because “What do you mean by that? What if I told you both of my parents are African-American, then what?” As time has gone on, I don’t take it personally much anymore. I’ve even had a myriad of experiences where Spanish speaking strangers have approached me and just started speaking to me directly in their native tongue. Now I may have taken Spanish in high school, but I am definitely no conversationalist in the language. The most people get out of me is: “Yo no se tu hablas. No hablo español.” Sure, the fact that I can respond is comical as well, because if I’m telling them that, then what the heck am I talking about? Am I sure I’m incapable? They usually get where I’m coming from though, in which then the apology follows with a brief awkward giggle and explanation of assuming that I had some sort of Hispanic heritage in me – people usually think I am Dominican every single time it happens. 

Although these questions can create an interesting story to share and become part of my lore, the main one that tends to still throw me off is: “So, where are you from?” 

Of course I still answer it, but mostly due to the pride I feel for my parents’ heritage and where they hail from: Jamaica. Alongside their Caribbean heritage, my mother is also half Indian. Oftentimes I feel like a broken record player when I start yapping to someone about it, but sometimes the responses can be harrowing. Similarly to what I already shared above: “Oh, that makes sense. Your complexion gives it away.” 

Again, “What do you mean by that?”

There’s a lot of nuance that comes with having immigrant parents and growing up in a multicultural home while trying to navigate American customs. My family jokes a lot about how I’m not a true Jamaican because I was born here in the United States and it has remained a running joke for as long as I can remember. Maybe even since the day I was born. Who knows? However, it can still be difficult to explain the culture that I’m most accustomed to because it truly depends on which side of the family you tend to spend the most of your time with. So it can be hard when you’re answering the question, which then turns into this elongated explanation about how my parents are from Jamaica, my mom’s half Indian, but I was born here, so there’s that. It’s truly a mouthful. I can understand how confusing it can be for some people to keep up with the intricacies of being born into a multicultural family and leaning towards one side more than the other or trying to maintain the focus on both, together. Of course, that’s dependent on how many you have. 

I was lucky enough to spend time with both sides, while also witnessing traditions that continue to be passed down from one generation to the next in both holidays, cuisine, customs, and even dialect. So, I’m not a stranger to the similar reaction that we’ve witnessed our current Vice President, Kamala Harris go through. Where, people question the credibility of her cultural makeup. If she’s a Black Woman, why does she only refer to herself as Jamaican, Indian? Why does she consistently showcase more of the Indian culture from her background than anything in correlation to what it means to be a Black woman? 

I vividly remember in high school a girl asking me, “When someone asks you what you are, what do you say?”

I replied, “I’m a Black woman.” 

Then she said, “Okay, and if they ask where you’re from, then what do you say?”

I simply informed her that I go on my little spiel but it all boils down to the exact question that I am being asked. In which, I find that having a good understanding of the difference between the following questions could make these conversations less complicated and run more smoothly without attempting to minimize one’s race:

“What is your nationality?”

“What is your ethnicity?”

“Where were you born?”

No one really asks what one’s race is because that’s based solely on the color of one’s skin. As this conversation continues to happen, I find that it’s imperative to have a good grasp on the meaning of each term. Which will in turn, help when asking these questions and receiving an accurate response and understanding of one’s background and lived experiences. If we get down even further into the nitty gritty, then as mentioned, there’s also race. However, although these words are used interchangeably, they still have very distinct meanings: 

Nationality is about legal citizenship or affiliation with a specific nation-state.

Ethnicity involves shared cultural traits and heritage, such as language, religion and customs.

Race focuses on physical characteristics and is often externally imposed. 

So, at the end of the day, I am a Black woman but I also identify as a Jamaican-American. My entire lived experience outside of my home has been curated on the basis of my race alone. Therefore, I have been a victim of racism, colorism and even gender bias. Even though I have immigrant parents, it does not absolve my past or even present experience as a Black woman and I believe it’s important that we keep this conversation going. Rather than attempting to outcast or separate one another based on ethnicity, be open to recognizing that two things can be true at once and that there remains a shared experience amidst the diaspora nonetheless. That way, we can be open to comprehending what it entails to be born into a multicultural family while simultaneously navigating the complexities that come with one’s racial class.